Lips of An Angel
by DoctorsPatient
Summary: I’ve never been one for superstitions or fate; but God had some weird way of twisting that! He sent Kate my way! Jate AU Fic - More Description Inside....
1. Prolouge: Lips Of An Angel

AN: This is my new Jate AU Fic - it's going to be quite angsty and im hoping that you all enjoy it :D As with most of my stories I will include lyrics to show my inspiration and set a little atmosphere for the chapters.

Summary: The story is set roughly in the present day so at the point where we are in FF, but all of the cannon stuff of lost hasn't happened so no island or plane crash … you catch my drift. But I have decided to keep a few cannon connections in there for example – Claire will be in this story and both her and Jack know they are brother and sister, (they'd made a lot of visits to each other every year and emailed so they are close) there will also be an Aaron. However Claire's husband died when she was 8 months pregnant and that's when she came from Australia to live in LA closer to Jack and her dad. Christian Shepard is alive at the time. Jack is married to Juliet but he isn't in love with her, he just did it because he was encouraged to. He then meets Kate and finds out what true love is. They have to keep things a secret and it begins to destroy them. They become completely consumed by each other and drastic things happen.

Disclaimer: I do not own LOST - I do not own Lips of An Angel or any such songs by the band Hinder and their label. All things used are interpretations of original material that I Do Not Own!

This chapter will include excerpts from the song "Lips of an Angel" by Hinder.

Prologue:

_Lips of An Angel_

__

Well, my girl's in the next room  
Sometimes I wish she was you  
I guess we never really moved on  
It's really good to hear your voice say my name  
It sounds so sweet  
Coming from the lips of an angel  
Hearing those words it makes me weak  
And I never wanna say goodbye  
But girl you make it hard to be faithful  
With the lips of an angel

I've never been one for superstitions or fate; I have never really looked at my horoscopes with care or worried about broken mirrors. Life was not about predicting the future or worrying about what Venus was doing for my love life. I laughed at my young sister for demanding to read my palms just in case a new wrinkle told her something about how many children I would have. Faith was never my strong point; I didn't belong to a religion and I had never really thought about afterlife, it was all about the here and the now. I took each day as it came because in a world with as much uncertainty as mine – each day was a new struggle to live on. I was always a sceptic, to believe in a God I would have had to see something to prove it to me; "seeing is believing" was what I would say.

Since my med school years and probably before, I have been a proud man of science and knowledge for everything had an explanation. Evolution was the reason humans walked the earth, a big bang created the world, not seven days of God's extreme gardening. I see that it was a lot more than scepticism; I was arrogant and sure in everything science had taught me. For what it is worth now I was wrong. Fate does exist and it tries its very hardest to make sure that you follow its plan. Two people could be on opposite sides of the earth and fate would concoct something to put them together if they were meant to be.

Some people say that when you meet your "one true love", the whole world stands still, time stops and you get tunnel vision. That vision shows you the one, that one girl who was your reason for being. You'd become crazed and sane all at the same time, constantly sick with obsession and devotion. I laughed when my friends went on about their "the ones" who eventually came and went like the tide on the shore. They had confused their lust for love and each time ended up with anger and heart break. I had never held up much hope for a true love, I had got married of course but that was because of mutual respect and kindness that I had found in my wife but I had never experience the burning consumption that love truly is. But, that all changed for me in a single moment.

The world was tipped on its axis and the floor fell from under me. I became a poet, a thrill seeker and a fool all at once. I'd become anything she wanted of me. I knew I'd do anything and everything for her. I felt a tug at my heart strings as if it was attached to her, like a puppy on a lead. She held my heart from the instant I met her and it was completely illogical. I had gone back on everything I had said in the past. My cynicism vaporised, fate was real – it had brought me to her. My first thought was calling my sister to check my horoscopes or something; I wanted to know my future because I wanted to see if she was it. She was perfect in my eyes. The curve of her smile as she danced away and the stars in her soft eyes captivated me instantly. God had some weird way of twisting my life story he tried to complicate everything with her. That wild confusing day the heavens sent me a curve ball and her name was Kate.

_But girl you make it hard to be faithful  
With the lips of an angel_

AN: Thank you for reading so fa, even thought its only a small prolouge - hopely you'll tune in for me.

Next Chapter: A Look into the history and current state of Jacks marriage to Juliet... :)


	2. We Carry One

AN: This chapter includes lyrics from the song "We Carry On" by Tim McGraw

Hello and thanks for reading on :D Please if you like my story please review because i'd love to know what everyone thinks of it! Okay so this Chapter is alot longer than the last one and i hope you like it ...

Chapter One:

_We Carry On_

_And we carry on  
When our lives come undone  
We carry on  
Cause there's promise in the morning sun  
We carry on  
As the dark surrenders to the dawn  
We were born to overcome  
We carry on_

Beyond the picket fences and the oil wells  
The happy endings and the fairy tales  
Is the reality of shattered lives and broken dreams  
We carry on

….Five Years Before….

The bright lights above my head did nothing to shake the fear that kept my cold hands shivering. A chilly tension set across the room yet there was a never ending sweat on my brow. I paced from wall to wall searching for some way or some where to run and escape myself. Looking in the long mirror before me, my heart fell at what I saw. My eyes were red, swollen and blood shot; it made a dark contrast to my sickly green skin. I looked just how I felt; like hell. Picking up the half empty whiskey glass I drained it all in one. Feeling the liquid seep down my throat; I felt the pain ease and then, when I thought it was gone – it returned with a fury. My head rushed and I supported myself with a table. I was being smothered by the flowers and the smells and the music. It was perfect, just how she had wanted it. Still, with everything around me and the voices just outside the door I had never felt so lonely. I shifted in the black suit that trapped me; it was more like going to a funeral than a wedding. _My_ wedding. After the months of persuasion from my friends and the years of being pressured into marriage by my mother I had finally caved in and proposed to my girlfriend Juliet. We'd been together for a number of years and we got on well, and I cared for her. That seemed enough for my family but it didn't stop the questions that had raced through my mind: "Was it really the right thing to do?"; "Was it the right way for a marriage to happen?"; "Could I learn to love her?" I knew the true answers in my heart, for if I loved her enough I wouldn't have reservations. Nevertheless, my stubbornness pushed foolish dreams aside.

I wanted to scream out loud with confusion. My head spun still, but not with booze - with thoughts. I was having visions of what my life would be like a married man. It would change my life forever. My world wouldn't just belong to me any more, everything I had belonged to someone else too. What if things did turn bitter years down the line – divorce? But what if children were involved? It was all too much with these endless questions. I was losing myself in the worry and the drink. It wasn't the idea of Juliet that repulsed me, but the idea of being so joined to one other person was a startling concept for me. I cared for Juliet – that much was true, but my worries were about myself. I couldn't help but picture our lives becoming so routine and synchronised that any amount of love we had now would fade into a bitter hatred. I'd seen it with my parents, my mother who was so loyal to my father, but he was never home; the years of loneliness made her cold and uncompassionate. Then there was my father, smothering himself in work he rarely made time for his family, his 'loneliness' lead him in another direction and so my half-sister was born. Even still after the biggest of betrayals my mother still stayed as if her free will against my father was lost the day they were married. I saw the damage their lives had done to them, and I didn't want to inflict that on any other person too. Breathing slowly I held the once pastel coloured walls for help.

I was pulled out of my stupor by the opening door. There standing against the wall was my best friend, I smiled gratefully; if anyone could remove my doubts it was Hurley.

"Hey you ready everyone's waiting?" his sparkling personality immediately brightened the room but his own contagious smile fell as he saw the emptiness of my expression. "Dude, you look like crap!" I remained silent too afraid of what I would say. He pulled up two soft chairs in front of the table; he grabbed two clean glasses and filled them from the water taps - the most sensible drink of the morning. "Now sit down and explain."

I gathered my thoughts and sighed. "Do you think I'm making a mistake?"

"What do you mean?"

"Juliet, what do you think of her?" He looked at me taken aback and he smiled as he replied:

"She's hot if that's what you mean?"

"No Hurley," I butted in rolling my eyes. "Personality, is she too proud or complex?"

He paused and took a deep breath; it was easy to see that he was thinking carefully about what to say. "All I know mate, is that she loves you. There is no other answer I can give you than that. If she loves you, that is all that matters, whether she is a fertility doctor or Americas Most Wanted." Ironically, we laughed. I straightened my suit jacket and poised myself for the big choice I was making. This was it, the second I stepped out the beckoning door I was devoting myself to one woman forever and as sure as I was now, a secret and hidden part of me was telling at me to run.

…. Present Day ….

Darkness was all around me; silence in the unknown. The feeling was chilling yet not unfamiliar. Many nights before this, I would lie awake and alone listening to the stillness of my apartment. There was an eerie sense of comfort in the solitude; as if I could hear undisturbed by the world. These early hours of the morning were my bubble, a mix the life of patients and family and having to impress people left me constantly exhausted, and in my own little cocoon, I could just be myself with my own thoughts. A pale dim light filtered from behind the curtains causing streaks of light to wash over the room; dawn was approaching swiftly and my eyes were beginning to take in the surroundings. The bed I lay in was as soft as satin and was made perfectly on one side, but it felt too big for me; too much excess. I sighed deeply trying to avoid my brain over analysing my circumstances. I pulled the covers from around me and the cold morning hit me instantly it sent goose bumps across my arms.

It took all I had to resist the urge to climb back to my warm blankets but, a hard day at work was calling. Lives to save and all that, so I put a dressing gown around myself and slipped into my slippers. Walking to the kitchens I looked at the photos that ran along the walls. A young smiling couple stared back at me from a beach in Hawaii. They looked so happy; my sister Claire had struck gold when she had met Edward. But in a sick twist they'd been married only a year when cancer had taken him away from her. It left her a devastated widow and a single mum to their 2 month old son Aaron all at such a young age. The picture had been taken just before Claire found out she was pregnant. As I looked at the picture I saw something in them that I'd never had with Juliet; I didn't know what it was but I knew that if I'd had it – I would know for sure. It was a glow that came from them, a once in a lifetime thing. The last picture proved that I hadn't found it; my wedding to Juliet. We stood close but no spark came from the picture – it was too posed.

As I entered the tiny kitchen I could smell the faint scent of coffee and saw a half empty pot standing on the side. It would be colder than the air right now. But, at least she had considered it. I threw it down the sink straight away. It splashed back on my hand and was ice cold. How long had she been gone? I checked the time. The old clock on the wall said half past 6, the same time I'd woke up almost every morning; my body seemed to be trained to that time. I had work in little over an hour and it was going to be a full day, consultations and surgery. Filling up a new pot of coffee I pulled today's newspaper from where Juliet always left it. As I sat down my attention turned to a note on the table, it was in Juliet's writing. All it said was:

"They called me in for an emergency consultation; see you at home for dinner – 7 o clock?

Juliet x"

I sighed; this was becoming a regular thing. I think that it was her latest case that they had her working on. The daughter of a rich Korean businessman and her husband had been trying for a baby but were having no luck. Juliet was doing what she could to assess their situation … or at least that's what she'd told me over a brief dinner. I'd always wondered if Juliet mentioning her clients was her way at hinting she wanted children over her own, but I'd ignored any hinting because the thought terrified me. There was no way I was ready for children and I didn't think that our relationship was ready either. As I drained my coffee I let the ideas fade with the drink. I had to block it all behind my built up walls and prepare myself for the day ahead. I picked out my spare suit and grabbed my keys. I drove to St Sebastian's Hospital all the while trying to avoid the ideas seeping into my mind.

….Five Years Before….

Claire stood before the congregation of our family and friends, she was nervous as I could tell; she twiddled her hair around her finger. I smiled at her and she relaxed.

"Well big brother," her Australian accent still shined through. "You've finally done it, all this time and now you and Juliet are married. I know it's the older sibling's job to say this but I'm so proud of you. You've found yourself a good person who loves you, and you know that I'm a sucker for a good romance story so when you told me how you'd met I thought you were playing me." I grinned in the memory; it was quite a classic moment.

"For those of you who don't know, my brother has this thing about saving people and when a pretty young blonde who lived on his street was calling out for help he just couldn't resist it. She'd got her cat stuck in a tree and couldn't get it down…" I hoped she would leave it there, but, knowing Claire – "so he decided to climb up and get it. Just as he reached for the cat Muffin," I pulled an embarrassed face. "It scratched him and he went tumbling out of the tree." The crowd laughed as she expected and I hid my head in shame cursing that damned rodent of a cat. I felt Juliet's hand rest on mine and she giggled at me, I couldn't help but laugh a little myself. It was like something out of a teen movie. Claire's audience settled down and she continued on a more serious note. "But think of it this way, we wouldn't be sitting here right now if it was for that cat and I'm glad we are. Welcome to our strange and dysfunctional family Juliet. To Jack and Juliet." Everyone cheered and a toast was made. I drank the glass, but I had to be careful. I felt the alcohol taking its affect; it sugar coated the evening, making everything seem dream like and peaceful.

A couple of hours later, people were buzzing on the constant supply of booze, dancing was past embarrassing and I could spot Juliet and her friends dancing the night away. I decided that now was the best time to sneak away for fresh air. As I exited the lavish hotel and I saw my father sitting on the curb - he held a bottle of whiskey in his right hand. He looked worse for the many drinks he would have had that day. I perched next to him and waiting for conversation. Silence was all that surrounded us, except the faint buzz of the disco inside and the gentle "glug glug" of whiskey going down his throat. This noise had become all too familiar through my life - Claire managed to shrug it off to stress, but she couldn't see what I saw. He was drinking his way to death and was trying so hard to reach it. I couldn't say anything to him, I didn't want to. But, drunk or not he's my father and I owed him that respect. I took the whiskey off him and joined him in the drink.

Present Day

I drifted back into my apartment as the stars shone in the sky, the long shift took a toll on me and I collapsed straight on the sofa. I was a little later than 7 and as I looked at the clock the guilt set in; it was closer to 12 o clock. From where I sat I could see the kitchen table, and my dinner was there. I strolled into the kitchen not really feeling the hunger now, but I warmed up the cold plate and ate out of courtesy. I grabbed a bottle of beer from the fridge, and tried to think of other things. I groaned and realised that the guilt wouldn't leave. I dragged myself towards the upstairs bedroom hoping Juliet would be asleep when I entered, I didn't want to see her hurt expression. I'd done exactly what I'd prayed I wouldn't; history was repeating itself and I was causing an innocent woman pain.

As I opened the door, light flooded in a line across the bed, illuminating Juliet's sleeping silhouette. Her steady breathing made me feel more at ease. I changed and climbed in beside her, I felt her stir beside me. She turned and faced me groggily and smiled a tired half-smile. "Hey" she whispered, her loving expression causing a lump to clog in my throat. I choked back a feeble reply. She put a hand to my cheek and whispered again, "been a long day?" I nodded her answer and she sighed. It wasn't a romantic loving sigh, it was a noise of sadness – knowing that half hearted answers were all she was going to get. She called night and turned with her back to me. There was a pause of silence until I heard her say "I love you Jack, you know that right?" I pulled my arms across her body in reply and held her tight to me. I didn't sleep that night as I watched her with a haunted feeling of dread.

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AN/ Thanks again ... Next Chapter JATENESS!


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